What is counselling?
Counselling is sometimes called a ‘talking therapy’. A counsellor listens carefully to what you say about a particular situation. They then respond to you so you can explore and understand more clearly what you are feeling and thinking. It is private and confidential.
Counselling is no longer thought of as a complementary therapy but is included here as it is something you may choose to do for yourself.
I have plenty of people giving me advice! Why would I need counselling?
Counselling is not the same thing as giving advice. A counsellor does not direct you into a particular course of action or pass judgement on something you have said or done.
‘If I were you I’d . . .’ is giving advice. ‘What do you think you might find helpful . . .? or ‘How would you feel if . . .?’ are examples of using a counselling approach, where any decisions are coming from you.
How can counselling help someone with breast cancer?
It can provide a space and a place to talk about your feelings, or about events current and past as well as hopes and fears. By offloading what is going round and round in your head, you may find you feel better able to cope and also get some useful strategies from the counsellor to help in feeling better in yourself. Some examples of different styles of counselling are:
• Cognitive behavioural therapies which focus on aspects of behaviour;
• Psychodynamic therapies which are concerned with your past life and experiences; and
• Humanistic techniques which concentrate on you as you are today taking into account some influences of the past.
Not every technique will suit everybody, so if you try one type of counselling and it doesn’t feel right you might want to try another with a different counsellor.
How many sessions of counselling will I need?
The first time you go to see a counsellor you should end the session by both agreeing to a ‘contract’. This covers the aim of your counselling sessions, and from this, how many times you plan to meet, how much each session will cost, how long sessions will last and where they will take place.
This is not a legal agreement, even though it is called a contract: it’s simply a word to describe whatever you and the counsellor have decided between you. You can, of course, change your ‘contract’ at any time, or stop your counselling sessions if you wish to do so.
Do counsellors have to be specially trained?
Yes, if they are to practise as counsellors they should have completed a professional training course. Counsellors or psychologists who wish to work with people who have breast cancer should have a recognised qualification or degree and be a member of one of the major associations for their professions. Ideally they should have some experience of working specifically with people who have cancer.
My practice nurse says she has counselling skills. Is this the same as being a counsellor?
Many people who provide support and a listening ear for people who have cancer have very good counselling skills but have not been professionally trained as counsellors.
They are able to listen to what the person is saying and to respond in a caring and empathic way. They will not enter into a ‘contract’ of the sort described above and usually provide their services for free.
Can I get counselling on the NHS?
More and more cancer treatment centres employ counsellors who may be psychologists, nurses or therapy radiographers who have had additional training in counselling. Local cancer support and self-help groups may have counsellors in the group who will see people free of charge or for a small fee.
Private counsellors will charge fees; some offer concessionary rates if you ask for them.
