Believing the best of people is very helpful in the process of forgiving people who hurt or offend us. As human beings, we tend to be suspicious of others and we often get hurt due to our own imagination. It is possible to believe someone hurt you on purpose when the truth is they were not even aware they did anything at all and would be grieved to know that they hurt you. God calls us to love others, and love always believes the best. First Corinthians 13:7 makes this clear: “Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening]” (emphasis mine).
In many ways, Dave and I are extremely different, yet we rarely ever argue or become angry with one another. That was not the case for many years, but we have learned to disagree agreeably. We each respect the other’s right to have an opinion, even if our opinions differ.
I can remember, during the early years of our marriage, focusing on everything I considered negative about Dave and ignoring his positive traits. My thoughts went something like this: We just don’t agree about anything. Dave is so stubborn, and he has to be right all the time. He is insensitive, and he just doesn’t care how I feel. He never thinks of anyone but himself. In reality, none of these thoughts were true! They only existed within my own mind; and my wrong thinking caused a great deal of offense and disagreement that could have been easily avoided had my mind-set been more positive. I “thought” myself into being offended by believing lies-just exactly what the enemy wanted me to do.
Over time, as I grew in my relationship with God, I learned the power of believing the best of people and meditating on the things that were good. As that happened, my thinking sounded like this, Dave is usually very easy to get along with; he has his areas of stubbornness but then so do I. Dave loves me and would never hurt my feelings on purpose. Dave is very protective of me and always makes sure I am taken care of. At first, I had to think these things on purpose because I had a habit of always choosing the negative, but now I actually feel uncomfortable when I think negative thoughts and positive thoughts come more naturally because I have disciplined myself to think them.
There are still times when people hurt my feelings, but then I remember that I can choose whether to be hurt or to “get over it.” I can believe the best or I can believe the worst, so why not believe the best, and enjoy my day? I grew up in a home that was filled with turmoil and anger, and I refuse to live that way now. I help create a good atmosphere around me by thinking good thoughts about others and by choosing to not be easily offended or angered.
I encourage you to believe the best about others. Resist the temptation to question their motives or to think they hurt you intentionally. Believing the best about others will keep offense and bitterness out of your life and help you stay peaceful and joyful. So, always do your best to believe the best.
Think about It
About whom do you need to begin to believe the best?
