Caring about other people is the greatest thing we can ever do because, as human beings, we are so innately selfish. Selfishness and self-centeredness are inbred in us. The focus of our thoughts tends to be on ourselves and whether we ever utter the words with our mouths or not, we constantly ask, “What about me? What about me? What about me?” This is not the way God wants us to live. I spent many years of my life as a very unhappy, dissatisfied person, and I wasted a lot of time thinking my unhappiness was someone else’s fault. Thoughts such as, If I just had more money, I would be happy, or If people did more for me, I would be happy, or If I did not have to work so hard, I would be happy,
or If I felt better physically, I would be happy filled my mind. The list of reasons I thought caused my unhappiness seemed endless, and no matter what I did to entertain myself nothing worked for long. I was a Christian; I had a growing ministry and a wonderful family but my joy level was definitely affected by my circumstances. Getting what I wanted made me happy for a while, but my happiness evaporated quickly and I soon needed another “fix” of getting my way or getting what I wanted. As I grew in my personal relationship with God, I literally became desperate for peace, stability, true happiness, and joy. That kind of hunger for change usually requires facing some truth-maybe some unpleasant truth or things we don’t like to admit-about ourselves, and I have learned that if we really want truth, God will give it to us. As I began seeking God for the root cause of my unhappiness, He showed me that I was very selfish and self-centered. My focus was on what others could and should do for me, rather than what I could do for them. That was not easy for me to accept, but doing so was the beginning of a life-changing journey with God.
As God led me, I was reminded that I had grown up in a home that did not love and kind. The people I lived with were self-focused and did not really care who was hurt as long as they got what they wanted. My role models were selfish, insensitive people. Since these were the character traits I observed, they were the ones I developed. No one ever taught me about love, kindness, or giving until I entered a relationship with God through Jesus Christ. God helped me begin to see myself as a person who could give and help. I had to change my thinking from, “What about me,” to “What can I do for you?” I would like to say this was an easy change to make, but the truth is that it was very difficult and took a lot longer than I like to admit.
Over time, I came to understand that God is love and His nature is that of a giver (see 1 John 4:8). He gives, He helps, He cares, and He sacrifices. He does not merely do these things occasionally, but they represent His constant attitude toward us. Love is not something God does, it is who He is. He always offers us love, generosity, grace, and help. It is true that God is just and there are times when He punishes sin, but even that He does out of love, for our own good, to teach us the right way to live. Everything God does is for our good; all of His commands are intended to help us have the best lives we can possibly have. He commands us to love and be kind to others, which means taking the focus off of ourselves, silencing the voice that asks “What about me?” and learning to follow Jesus’ example of being kind, generous, and loving toward others.
Think about It
Ask God to show you the root cause(s) of any unhappiness in your life. Be willing to face the truth about yourself even if you don’t like it. This is the first step toward a better life!
