Evaluate Your Friendships
Are the things around you helping you toward success or are they holding you back?
W. Clement Stone
It’s crucial that you evaluate your friendships from time to time – even those you’ve maintained for many years.
Trust me, this isn’t a minor issue. Those who occupy your time have a significant impact on your most priceless possession – your mind! Are you surrounding yourself with negative friends and spending a lot of time with them in your leisure hours? If so, I’m going to ask you to think about spending much less time with these people – or even no time at all with them.
Sounds harsh, doesn’t it? After all, I’m suggesting that you limit – or eliminate – your involvement with some long-standing friends. When I tell people this at my seminars, invariably someone will raise a hand and accuse me of being cold or uncaring. The audience member will typically say, “Shouldn’t we try to help our negative friends instead of dumping them?”
Well, you’re free to do whatever you think is best, and each situation must be dealt with on its own unique facts. However, I’ve found that in most cases, hanging around these negative friends doesn’t help them – and it doesn’t help you, either! Everyone gets dragged down because most negative people don’t want to change. They just want someone to listen to their tales of woe.
If you have a strong urge to spend time with negative friends, ask yourself: “Why am I choosing to be with these people?” Consciously or unconsciously, you may be choosing to hold yourself back – to be less than you are capable of becoming.
By the way, I think it’s wonderful to try to help someone overcome their negativity. But if you’ve been trying for several years… and aren’t getting anywhere… maybe it’s time to move on! Let me clarify one important point. I’m not making a judgment here that negative people are any less worthy than other people. I’m saying there are consequences if you spend time with people who are negative. What are the consequences? You’ll be less happy and less successful than you could be.
